I'll always be with you
by x lost fairytale
Summary: Have no fear, Satoshi-sama, I'll always be with you...' Whispers a velvety voice in his ear. KradxSatoshi, hinted SatoshixDaisuke


Yes, somehow it would seem that I'm obsessed with Krad xD He really makes a lovely character to write^^ And because I live for Krad/Satoshi angst, here you go once again^^

**Disclaimer: do you really want to hear that again...?**

* * *

**I'll always be with you**

* * *

'Satoshi-sama...'

_That_ voice, always there, _always _mocking him. A poison in his mind, always lingering, always whispering. He couldn't trust his own thoughts, knowing they would also be _his. _He couldn't yearn, or even wonder about friendship, knowing what _he _would say.

'No one will hurt you, Satoshi-sama. I'll make sure no one will ever hurt you. I will protect you, you are my everything, Satoshi-sama... I will always protect you...'

"Can you protect me from yourself?" He asks bitterly, staring with a blank look at the white walls. White, pale, dull. Hollow, one could say. Just like him.

* * *

'Have no fear, Satoshi-sama, I'll always be with you...' Whispers a velvety voice in his ear.

Ah, the irony of that...

* * *

'You're looking at that Niwa again...' _He _whispers, and is it jealously that he hears, deep inside that inhuman voice?

'Why?' The angel - no devil, monster, curse, hated being, _he _- asked him once.

"Because he's everything you're not!" He hisses.

He only receives a laugh as an answer.

* * *

'He does not deserve your friendship, Satoshi-sama...' Such soft words, so mischiefing. 'And he does not deserve your love at all...'

He flinches, just a little, before he catches himself. "Don't imply things like that!"

'Oh? Is it really implying then, Satoshi-sama?'

"Of course it is, you fool." He growls.

So it has turned to the point in which he even has to lie to himself...

* * *

'It is not really my fault, you do know that, don't you, Satoshi-sama?'

He leans against the wall of the museum and looks at the dark sky. "Now really... It's Dark's then?"

'Of course it is, Satoshi-sama.' Mimicks the winged shadow him. 'You see, if he died, I would leave too.'

"That's pathetic..." He shakes his head and looks away from those burning, golden orbs. "You do all this just for killing him?"

'You wouldn't understand, Satoshi-sama...'

No, he didn't.

* * *

"H-Hiwatari-kun!" Red eyes look at him nervously. "Are you alright? I-I mean... Dark.. he didn't really mean to hurt you... I-I'm so sorry, Hiwatari-kun!"

'No,' he mutters silently at the amused presence inside of him, 'he only meant to hurt you, now didn't he?' And that's why he's the one bearing the bruises right now...

'You see, Satoshi-sama...' The voice takes his chance, perfectly chosen in this small moment of bitterness and hatred against the thief. 'I would never hurt you, Satoshi-sama, _never_. He does, you do see that, right? He'll always hurt you, just because it's me, inside of you. He won't ever think of you, he hates you, they both _hate _you. No worries, Satoshi-sama, I'll protect you, I will not let them harm you. I will kill him, so you can be save. I will kill both of them, so you'll never have to worry ever again...'

And sometimes, he really wishes that those whispers can come true.

* * *

It hurts... Sometimes, it really _hurts. _Everything, it almost seems...

The pain in his body, after yet another night chasing Dark, after another night in which wings rip themselves out of his body and _he _takes over.. But that is not the only pain, it's also deeper inside of him, in that one place, that he tries to keep cold and emotionless. Seeing Niwa-kun laugh, seeing Niwa-kun with his friends, seeing Niwa-kun speaking to absolutely no one - Dark - in the middle of the class, shocked or embarrassed by what his other half said, blushing when the class stares him.

"Are you happy, Niwa-kun?" He asks one day while walking home with the boy. "Are you happy being who you are, being with him all the time?"

"Well, I-" A concerned look.

"Please don't lie, I just want to know." He mutters.

"I am." Niwa says with a small smile. "I know you don't like Dark, but when you get to know him, he's really nice, he - NO, I'm not meaning THAT! - sorry, that was-"

The boy starts to babble, while he just looks at the road, softly sighing.

"Hiwatari-kun?" A soft voice asks, with a hand that is kindly placed on his arm. "I really wish that I could do something for you..."

'But he can't, Satoshi-sama, can't you see that? He'll always hurt you in the end...'

"Shut up!" He hisses, before he smiles at the questioning look on Niwa's face. "Sorry, that was-"

He finds himself caught in a hug before he can finish that sentence, and _his _angry words are somehow dimmed out when Niwa smiles sadly at him. "I really wish I could do something, Hiwatari-kun! I'm so sorry it is you... with-"

"I'm just glad it isn't you." he says with a kind - really kind, even though he knows he will curse himself for that later - smile.

* * *

'If _we _killed those Niwas, you would never feel this way again, Satoshi-sama...' _His _voice promises him.

* * *

He looks into the mirror, winching when he sees the blue marks on his back, _again._ He sends the white creature behind him - or rather, next to his image in the mirror - an angry glare. "Even though you _care so much for _me, you don't seem to worry about hurting me, now do you?" Golden eyes look back through small slits.

_'You _interfered, Satoshi-sama.'

"Because _you _were trying to kill Niwa." He hisses back.

Arms, not really there, yet still... _there_, wrap themselves around him and the voice sounds almost saddened. 'Just let me end it, once and for all, Satoshi-sama, just trust me... I'll make sure you'll be save, always...'

"Don't even try!" He snaps, trying to free himself from the oh so tender grip. "Don't even suggest killing Niwa! You... Always hurting, always killing- You're a monster!"

'And who do you think made me that way, Satoshi-sama?'

Before he can react, the presence disappears in his mind. And for the first time, Satoshi can find no words to answer.

* * *

"What are you doing?" He asks suspiciously, glaring from his bed at the angellike being standing there next to the window, golden eyes looking at him, now, but also then, when he was asleep, when he woke up, staring into sun-like pools filled with emotions in them he's never seen before.

'Nothing, Satoshi-sama...'

And yet... that look. Not evil, nor sadistic, mocking, hateful, not... _him? _He know he's gaping, but he really doesn't care, because...

'What is it, Satoshi-sama?'

He laughs, his eyes softening just a little bit. "You actually looked peaceful..."

* * *

'He doesn't deserve you, no one does...' He whispers in his ear. 'Just forget about that boy, he'll only hurt you in the end, he won't be there for you, can't you see? But I'll be with you, forever, I'll protect you, I'll always be with you. Just let me...'

A small faltering, but he notices it even when he was not listening - or trying not to.

'You're my everything.' The voice tries to convince him and he finally realises the words aren't just spoken to mock him.

* * *

'What are you doing, Satoshi-sama?' For once, that voice actually sounds a little bit worried. 'Dark...'

"Yes yes, Dark is coming, but _we _are not going."

'I don't think I understand what you mean...'

"O, you do," he says with a small smile, leaning back in his chair and returning the gaze of those golden orbs. "We're not going to the museum anymore, nor are we going to stop Dark, nor are we even going to protect the artwork. It's very simple, actually. I don't want to hurt Niwa anymore, neither myself. You are not going to stop as long as that thief is around, and he's not going to stop as long as he gets all the attention and you chasing him for eternity. So," he looks at the game of chess in front of him, a pale finger pushing against the white king, making it fall. "When one player is gone, how long will the other hold on? We know Dark only does it for fun, he'll get bored after a while when there are no challenges."

He sees some kind of emotion flicker across those delicate features, and it is not anger, nor annoyance.

"Be honest with me," he asks the white winged creature. "You don't want this, you hate it, in fact." Just a small shift of the eyes, and he knows he's winning. "I know you do, you're me and I'm you, remember? That mask of yours, it's breaking. And- and mine is too. "

* * *

_'You're my everything...' The voice tells him. _

_He never really saw the emotions in those golden eyes, when he turned his head away with only hatred in his heart._

* * *

"I think you being one half of an artwork is a wrong thing to say." He utters one day and that mask breaks even more, when a childlike confusion is formed. "He's whole, you should be too."

'I-' It was always him - Satoshi, strong yet weak with _him _- who faltered, yet...

"Live," he tells the pale shadow. "You should just live, you should be yourself again."

'I don't understand...'

"Let's just say..." He sighs, turning his head away from that burning stare. "That I'm not _them. _They made you into a monster, I'll make you into-" Majestic white wings, golden hair, white clothes, almost pure. He smiles sarcastic "I'll make you into an angel."

* * *

Everything changes somehow, step by step. The phone stopped ringing after a while, when that annoying Saehara had finally given up. Niwa's questioning eyes didn't chase him after he shrugged bored at the "Hiwatari-kun.. ha-have you - has _he_- given up?".

And for the first time, it was Satoshi Hiwatari who spoke at absolutely no one - him, Krad - in the middle of the class. Muttering an excuse, he looked annoyed at the paper in front of him, ignoring the remark his other half had given him. Really, his handwriting was not _that _bad!

* * *

"It's beautiful.." He whispers, looking at the gifted paint streaks of blue - and understanding the use for that colour too, though it doesn't bother him like it used to do. "Why did you make it?"

He receives a shrug. 'I do have to find new... hobbies, Satoshi-sama.'

For the first time in years, he really smiles.

* * *

'Have no fear, Satoshi-sama, I'll always be with you...' Whispers a velvety voice in his ear.

Blue eyes with true, real emotions close.

"Thank you..."

* * *

**Fin. **


End file.
